You, Always
by myRyRy
Summary: A near death experience can change everything. It can make a person question who they are, what they believe, or who they want to be. But no matter what, in the end, they're still the same person. CB. Blair is mugged a few days into her French vacation.
1. Chapter 1

_A near death experience can change everything. It can make a person question who they are and what they believe and who they want to be. But no matter what, in the end, they're still the same person. ChuckxBlair. Blair is mugged a few days into her summer break in France._

_I don't know any French, therefore, all italics in this part are representing what would be spoken in French._

* * *

Maybe inviting Serena to come with her to Paris had been a mistake.

The idea of spending the summer in France had been to get away and escape all her problems. All she wanted to do was forget a wasted year at NYU and get over a boy who broke her heart too many times to count.

But after only five days, Blair wants to add her best friend to the list of things to forget as well.

This was supposed to be a summer of tanning, eating macaroons, and shopping while being completely carefree and simply having fun together. So far though, every night had consisted of her getting drunk while she watched Serena flirt with boy after boy until eventually disappearing with one at the end of the night, leaving Blair to find her way home alone.

She had hoped tonight would be different, but after dinner at La Rotisserie du Beaujolais followed by just a few drinks at Le Kong, Serena disappeared yet again with a brunette boy wearing a hideous maroon scarf and cheap sunglasses, clearly not realizing he was inside and it was night, while reciting french poetry that was obviously meant just to get into the blonde's panties.

Sighing, Blair rolls her eyes and spins the stem of her martini glass between her fingers. Looking bored around the room, she finds her self looking at couple after couple sipping drinks, sitting and dancing close, and whispering intimately as they gaze at each other. Her heart aches at their loving smiles and wonders how she thought a summer in the city of love was supposed to make her forget about her bass-tard ex.

She tips back the rest of her martini before quickly pulling a few bills out of her Chanel bag and dropping them onto the table. Pushing herself from the bar, she sways slightly as she stands, definitely feeling a buzz. She pulls her jacket across her shoulders and stumbles a little on her four-inch heels towards the exit.

The cool air hits her face and she crosses her arms and tightens her jacket against her chest. There are many cabs still driving the streets, but she's only a few blocks from her mother's penthouse, so she decides to walk.

Her mind wanders, and for about the millionth time over the past few weeks, she wonders what Chuck is up to at that moment. She suspects that he is wallowing in self pity, drowning himself in a sea of drugs and prostitutes, and there is some kind of sick pleasure that comes to her at the thought of him suffering without her. She doesn't even know if she should call what he did to her heartbreak, because the word seems too cliche to describe what she's been feeling. It feels as if there are only scraps of her heart left over for her to collect and somehow try to rebuild from the destruction.

What hurts the most though, is that even after all the games and lies and tears, she still misses him; from the way he would smile this certain way just for her, to the way he would hold her at night. No matter how bad she tries to forget their relationship had even existed, it still feels like a piece of her is missing.

A sudden bump against her shoulder jars her from her thoughts and makes her gasp.

"Uh! Watch where you're going," she retorts quickly with drunken annoyance, even though she was so distracted that she wasn't sure who bumped into who or even what was going on. She unexpectedly finds herself staring into the bright blue eyes of a semi-attractive man who couldn't have been much older than herself, and grins at him, not noticing how off he looks. "I'm so sorry, I.."

There's a hard jab against her side and she instantly hisses in surprise at the object crushing painfully against her ribs. An unmistakeable click overwhelms her senses and immediately she is thrown into an unbelievable panic where she feels as if she can barely breathe.

"_Keep your mouth shut or I'll shoot._"

She whimpers as hot breath brushes against her ear and his sweaty fingers curl around her arm, guiding her staggering into an alley a few feet away. It all seems to happen so quickly that she can barely comprehend it. Her back hits the brick building he shoves her against and her attacker immediately begins robbing her of her expensive accessories. He takes her Chanel bag from her in a second before harshly grabbing and pulling the diamond chocker around her throat so hard it cuts into her neck and makes her cry out before, thankfully, finally snapping in half. She doesn't fight back, not even when he commands her to give him the ruby ring her father had given her when he moved away when she was sixteen; she's too smart and too scared and relieved that he's finally taken all he can from her.

He steps back and examines her as her heart pounds out of control in fear.

"_Take off your dress._"

Her stomach turns sickly and she swallows against her overwhelming terror. "No," she answers as strongly as she can, unable to help the way her voice trembles.

His brow furrows in anger and he briskly pulls his concealed gun out of his pocket and points it at her once again. "_I said take off your dress._"

She stands paralyzed in horror, both at the sight of the gun and at his command, tears silently starting to slide down her cheeks. Blair suddenly can't breathe but somehow she manages to shake her head just the slightest.

Immediately his eyes turn dark at her refusal and burn into her maddeningly. He furiously closes the distance between them, enraged. The metal pistol digs harshly into her stomach as he violently pulls at the strap of her dress with his free hand. His mouth attaches to her neck and he sickly presses himself against her.

She pushes against him, but he's stronger and he has a weapon, so it almost seems hopeless. But she is Blair Waldorf, and she refuses to give up like this. She shoves harder against his shoulders and within seconds, and without thinking, she's kicking and scratching with everything she has.

In an instant all the air rushes out of her. The world around her explodes with noise before becoming eerily still and silent. There's a horrific, burning pain spreading through her body and her fingers press against her side instinctively. She looks down to see dark blood seeping between her manicured fingers, and she's so overwhelmed with pain and panic that it takes moments for her to realize she's been shot. She gasps desperately for a breath as she looks up, just as the man turns and begins running down the alley as fast as he can to get away from her.

She knows in that moment that she is going to die.

Everything spins around her and she staggers back, before helplessly falling to the ground.

Her watery eyes focus briefly on the starry sky above, and her last thought before she falls unconscious, is how happy and warm and safe she'd felt when she had fallen asleep in Chuck's arms, watching those same stars at her father's chateau the summer before. She wishes she could go back there now.

–––

His eyes slowly drift open to the dull red sun hanging low in the sky and burning into his hazel eyes. He flinches and turns away, burying himself under layers of starchy, expensive sheets, before a buzzing fills the room and he realizes what woke him up in the first place; his cell phone. He lets out a heavy breath and pokes his head out from under the fabric, brown unkempt hair sticking in every which way.

Staring at the offending object, he wills it to stop ringing. He feels slightly on edge as the phone stops ringing for a split second, before instantly starting to ring again. He doesn't even want to know who's calling. He hasn't heard from anyone in a couple weeks, and honestly, he doesn't want to. All he wants to do is fall a little deeper into his pool of self pity and scotch, and hopefully one day he'll finally drown.

Over and over he listens as his phone continually rings, even after the sun has set and he is cloaked in darkness in his Prague hotel room until he just can't take it anymore. Throwing off the covers, he stalks across the messy room in search of the offending object.

Snatching up the phone, he grunts into the speaker, "Hello?"

"Chuck."

Instantly he recognizes the voice of his best-friend and he sighs and slumps back tiredly into an overstuffed hotel arm chair. "Nathanial.." he drawls, "Calling to thank me for leaving you my little black book?"

Nate sighs on the other side of the line. "No, that's not why I'm calling."

"Well you better not waste it. That book is priceless. Some of the girls in there can do the dirtiest.."

"Chuck?" he interrupts, his voice hesitant.

"What?" he questions, reaching out for the forgotten tumbler of scotch on the coffee table. "Did something happen between you and Serena again or something?"

"No, man. It's.." he stumbles over the words, knowing what he has to say will break his best friend. "It's about Blair."

He swallows painfully at the sound of her name, before shaking his head to try to clear it. "She wants nothing to do with me, Nate" he tells his friend dejectedly. "Whatever she's doing is her own business."

"She's in the hospital, Chuck."

Chuck instantly feels a sick weight drop in his stomach. "What?" he chokes out, his heart pounding painfully in his chest. He silently listens, horrified, to the few scattered details his best friend knows before wordlessly hanging up the phone.

He sits stock still, letting the news sink into him in the deafening silence of his hotel room. Clenching his fists in anger, he lets his eyes sweep across the table before him, containing all the proof of what his life had become; white powder, pills, and various bottles of alcohol. In one sweeping motion, he sends it all to the floor with a crash, the weight of the world crushing down on his shoulders.

Picking back up the phone, he instantly starts barking orders to his staff. "Have the private jet prepared within the hour. No exceptions."

He has to make sure she is okay, no matter how bad of a place their relationship is in right now. She is his everything; he's known since that moment in the limo to the second he bought the ring he never got the chance to use, but still carries in his pocket everyday. Without her, he is nothing, and he's determined to do anything in his power to ensure she survives.

* * *

_TBC...?_


	2. Chapter 2

_A near death experience can change everything. It can make a person question who they are and what they believe and who they want to be. But no matter what, in the end, they're still the same person. ChuckxBlair. Blair is mugged a few days into her summer break in France._

_Wow, thank you guys so much for all the responses to this story! I'm glad people are so interested. :)_

* * *

Chuck arrives at the hospital in France late that night after the longest two hour flight of his life and a taxi ride that was just long enough to make his fears and his self-loathing go out of control. Now as he stares up at the building where his ex-girlfriend is fighting for her life, he feels as if he's going to have a panic attack.

He knows he'll never be able to forgive himself if the last months of Blair's life were so miserable for her because of him, and he doesn't know if he can live knowing the last time they ever talked, it was while she yelled at him through tears he had caused.

She can't leave him forever like this. She just can't.

His fingers shake at his sides and he forms them into fists to make them stop.

He can't lose her.

"I won't lose her," he assures himself out loud. He takes one last deep breath before pushing his way through the double doors and into the hospital, the sickly sterile scent overwhelming his senses. He briefly stops at the reception desk before quickly heading to the fourth floor where he finds out the Waldorf family is waiting.

He expects to walk into a depressing, somber waiting room where the Waldorfs and Roses are trying to fall asleep in uncomfortable hospital chairs. Instead what he walks into is near chaos.

Eleanor is yelling into her cell phone in French about what sounds like some fashion emergency back at the atelier. Roman is wildly pacing back and forth in the middle of the room. Cyrus is talking animatedly to a French police officer, while two other officers are questioning a hysterical Serena and a distraught Harold sits at her side.

"I told you, I don't know anything!" Serena sobs at the top of her lungs. "I didn't see anyone watching her and I didn't think she was in any danger before I left, otherwise I wouldn't have left her!" She huffs dramatically and wipes at her eyes as she turns away from the cops.

Her eyes light up the second they land on her brother standing in the hallway and she instantly jumps to her feet. "Chuck!"

He's confused as Serena rushes across the room to him because just a couple weeks ago, she would barely even speak to him after all that he's done, but right now he doesn't have the capacity to worry about that. He's too worried about Blair. The blonde wraps her arms around him almost desperately and he hesitantly hugs his sister back, allowing her to bury her face into his neck as she shakes with tears.

Looking over her shoulder, Chuck suddenly is very aware of the momentary silence that has taken over the room. Harold's sad eyes meet his and he barely acknowledges him before he goes back to speaking with the cops, while Roman and Cyrus both look up at him with piteous, melancholy small smiles. Eleanor, though, full on glares at him. Her sullen eyes stare into his and he can feel her hatred pouring out of her towards him until she finally rolls her eyes and turns her back on him, going right back to yelling into her phone.

He swallows back his emotions at feeling outcasted by people he had once thought would be his family. Obviously, Blair had let them know at least some of what had transpired to lead the demise of their relationship. He sighs to himself and quickly forgets about it, refocusing on what is really important right now.

"Serena," he starts, his voice strong and determined as he pulls out of their hug and meets her crying eyes. "How is she?"

She shrugs and her bottom lip trembles and Chuck feels his stomach drop.

"How bad is it?"

"They said if she hadn't been found right after it happened, she would have…" Serena trails off, because she can't bear to say the words, but he knows exactly what she means.

He takes a shaky breath as fear and worry once again overwhelm him. "What exactly happened, S?"

Serena sighs and wipes at her cheeks again. "The cops said she was found without any jewelry or her purse. Luckily she had her phone in her pocket so they could call Eleanor otherwise she'd be here all alone."

"She is all alone!" he exclaims, looking around the room where all of her family still is. "Why isn't anyone with her right now?"

"She's still in surgery, Chuck," Serena tells him softly, placing a hand on his arms.

His heart pounds in his chest and he can see Eleanor glaring at him once again and his shoulders slump. "Maybe I should go wait somewhere else." He sighs and shakes his head. "I mean, who knows if she would even want me here."

"No, stay here, Chuck," she says seriously, tightening her hand around his arm. "I know that Blair will want to know you're here for her when she wakes up."

"I wouldn't be so sure about that."

Both Chuck and Serena turn to see Eleanor has come to stand right behind them, a horrible scowl on her face.

"I doubt that being shot will make my daughter suddenly change her mind about you, Charles. Maybe it would be best if you did wait somewhere else," she sneers at the young man. She turns to go sit back down before pausing and turning her glare on her daughter's best friend. "You can feel free to join him, Serena."

Serena's jaw drops and she can't help the fresh batch of tears that start to fall. Chuck is also a little shocked, but more that his step sister seems to be just as hated as himself. He goes to ask her about it and try to find out more of the attack, but he doesn't get the chance.

"Family of Blair Waldorf?"

Everyone in the room immediately turns their attention to the doctor in the corner and within seconds everything except Blair's well-being is forgotten. Eleanor puts away her phone, Harold and Cyrus excuse themselves from the policemen, Roman goes to his husbands side, while Chuck and Serena, who were just basically told to leave, suddenly couldn't be removed no matter what. The two adopted siblings make their way over to the group and Serena holds desperately to her brother's hand for support, while he's too worried about what the doctor will say to even notice.

"The surgery took much longer than expected, but Ms. Waldorf is a very strong young lady," the doctor explained through his thick French accent. "We were able to remove the bullet, but there was a significant amount scar tissue, as well as very heavy blood loss. We've moved her to intensive care and she will be there for as long as is necessary. Her wound is very delicate and we've had to put her on a blood transfusion to try and get her levels back up."

"She will make a full recovery though, right Doctor?" Harold speaks up.

"The first couple days will be very crucial, but as long as everything goes as planned from this point forward, I expect her to fully recuperate," he assures them all. "Her anesthesia should actually be wearing off in a little while so if you'd like to, one or two of you are free to go sit with her."

Chuck can't help but hope he'll be allowed to go see her, and he knows when Serena tightens her grip on his hand, she's hoping the same thing. But it's quickly decided that Harold and Eleanor will go be with Blair and in seconds they disappear down the hallway behind the doctor. He can't help but be disappointed, even if part of him knows he shouldn't force his presence on Blair after all that's happened between them. But he needs to see her, if only for a second, just to confirm for himself that she's still alive and fighting.

"Don't pay too much attention to Eleanor," Cyrus tells the two of them sincerely after his wife has left. "She's just very upset about what's happened. She'll soften up eventually." The small man pats Chuck on the back, and then hugs Serena, before he makes his way back over to the police to talk again.

He anxiously digs hands into his suit pocket and looks around the room. "Well what are we supposed to do now?"

"We wait," Roman declares, before going to sit down.

"Yeah, come on," Serena agrees calmly, feeling relief from the doctor's prognosis. "We'll get to see Blair once Harold and Eleanor have." She motions for him to sit down next to her when she goes to sit with Roman.

Chuck's jaw tenses anxiously and he shakes his head. "I can't just sit here and do nothing."

"There's nothing more you can do though. The doctor said she's going to be fine."

"Were we listening to the same doctor?" he asks incredulously. "Because what I just heard is that she almost bled to death and now she's in intensive care!" He grits his teeth in annoyance before begrudgingly dropping into a plastic chair. He wrings his hands and curses. "I can't believe someone did this.." he trails off as he catches sight of his pinky ring and an idea suddenly strikes him.

He turns to his sister with his brow furrowed in thought. "You said they took _all_ of her jewelry?" Off Serena's nod he immediately jumps to his feet and excuses himself, ignoring the odd look she gives him.

Once he is alone in the hallway, he quickly pulls out his phone and calls his P.I.

"Mike, I need you to do something for me," he drawls into his phone, clenching his free hand into a fist. "I need you to check all pawn shops within a fifty mile radius of Paris to see if a gold ring with a ruby heart on it has been sold, and if you find it, I need to know everything there is to know about whoever sold it."

–––

At first everything is a haze. Her limbs feel heavy, her mouth feels dry, and there's a dull ache in her stomach that just won't go away. She turns her head tiredly to the side and she instantly feels a tight grip around her hand. Curiously, she allows her eyes to flutter open and she flinches against the bright white of the room.

"Blair-Bear.."

She blinks slowly and her vision swims as she sees her father's warm face smiling down at her through tears. She closes her eyes again and tries to will away the feeling that her head is stuffed with a million cotton balls.

"Blair-Bear, open your eyes," he softly coaxes. "Everything is fine. You're gonna be alright."

She squints, but opens her eyes, and feels dizzy as she looks up at him. "Daddy.."

His smile widens and more tears start to fall as he leans over and kisses her forehead. "I'm right here, sweet pea. Your mother's here too."

"Mom?" she breathes in question, sliding her gaze to where her mother has appeared at her father's side.

"Yes, darling, I'm so glad you're awake," her mother announces tearfully, brushing her fingers against Blair's pale cheek.

"Where are we?" she questions softly, her brow furrowing.

"We're at the hospital, dear," Eleanor answers hesitantly. "Don't you remember what happened?"

She closes her eyes and thinks for a moment before it comes back to her, but it all seems a little vague. "I was... shot, right?" she asks looking at her father, because that's what she remembers. She remembers excruciating pain and being certain that she was going to die and having no time to even attempt to make peace with it.

She knows that she's supposed to be dead right now.

"Yes, sweetie, I'm afraid that's what happened," Harold confirms, squeezing her hand.

"And the police are doing everything they can to find whoever did this to you," her mother quickly adds.

She nods, looking down at the horrid white blanket on the bed to avoid their gazes.

"But don't think about that. Just get some rest for now," her mother continues, moving her fingers to brush through her daughter's hair.

"Yes, Blair-Bear, you need to get some sleep," her father agrees. "And when you wake up, Serena and Chuck can come visit you. I know they're both very eager to come see that you're okay," he smiles, trying to cheer up his daughter, while her mother immediately glares at him.

Blair's tired eyes widen as much as they can while this weird feeling settles in her gut. A small part of her can't help but be comforted to hear that her ex-whatever is there waiting for her, but it is hugely overshadowed by the anxious and confused sensation growing in her stomach. "Serena and Chuck?" she repeats in uncertainty before she comes to an unexpected decision. She bites her lip and sighs. "I don't want to see them."

Eleanor's lips instantly fall into a relieved grin.

Harold studies Blair in confusion. "You don't want to see either of them, sweetie? Not even Serena?"

"No.. I really don't want to," she repeats and she's almost surprised at how much she means it. Her eyes grow heavy, and she lets them close for a long moment, before looking back at her parents. "Please don't let them in here."

"Don't worry about that, dear, we'll take care of everything," Eleanor assures her daughter before her ex-husband has a chance to speak. "You just get some rest, okay?"

Both of her parents tell her they love her and kiss her on the cheek, tucking her in like they haven't since she was a little girl, before she finally lets her eyes drop shut for good. But as she starts to drift off, she can't seem to shake the uneasiness from her troubled and drugged mind.

* * *

_TBC..._


	3. Chapter 3

_A near death experience can change everything. It can make a person question who they are and what they believe and who they want to be. But no matter what, in the end, they're still the same person. ChuckxBlair. Blair is mugged a few days into her summer break in France._

_Thank you guys so much for the great responses! I really appreciate it and it got me to write pretty fast lol. :)_

_

* * *

_

Her eyes slowly flutter open to the room around her and it takes a few seconds for everything to register in her mind once again.

Blair was robbed, assaulted, shot, and left for dead. The knowledge of all this makes her stomach turn in disgust and her skin crawl at the violation she's been through. She sighs in to the room and there is quick a rustling of paper, alerting her of her father's presence still by her side.

"Sweet-pea," Harold smiles, folding the newspaper he had been reading and setting it aside. Leaning across the bed, he brushes the hair away from her forehead, smiling comfortingly down at his daughter. "How are you feeling?"

She tries to smile back and shrug her shoulders, but she is immediately wincing in pain at the movement. She bits her lip before grinding out a simple, "Okay."

Her father frowns at her and holds her hand. "Please be honest if you're hurting, sweetheart. It's the only way we can be sure you'll recover."

"I'm fine, Daddy," she assures him, because in all honesty, she feels better much than the last couple times she woke up. Her head is much clearer, and even though she can suddenly remember every detail of her attack, at least she can actually think. She takes a deep breath and winces a little once again. "I'm just.. fragile."

Harold's frown turns into a melancholy smile. "You can't blame me for being worried after all that's happened to you, Blair-Bear." His grip tightens on her hand. "You gave us quite a scare."

"I'm sorry, Daddy," she breathes, looking down at the bed.

"Don't apologize," he gently chides. "You've done nothing wrong. I'm just so glad you're alright."

She nods and holds his hand back tighter, before turning her gaze towards the window. The blinds are pulled but she can see the bright sunlight peeking through the gaps and she just wants out of this bed and this hospital and to take this all back. She wishes she had just taken a cab home or yelled at Serena for ditching her once again or that she hadn't been so distracted thinking about Chuck. She closes her eyes as that weird, anxious feeling she'd felt when she'd first woke up overwhelms her once again.

"Do you want to talk about what happened?" her father suddenly asks.

She frowns and opens her eyes, staring at the sunlight being trapped outside. "No," she simply responds with a sigh.

"Are you sure, sweetie?" he asks again. "I know that the police are going to want a statement form you soon, and I think it would be easier if you tell someone you know first."

She shakes her head. "I don't really want to talk about it right now."

Her father sighs, a little frustrated, before putting on a smile and starting in on something else. "Well maybe you'd feel better if you saw some of your friends," he suggests softly. "Serena and Chuck have been waiting to see you all night, and I believe that Nate arrived from New York this morning. I think that would cheer you-"

She turns her gaze back to her father, interrupting him. "Actually, I kind of want to be alone."

He instantly looks a little offended, before his eyes turned worried. He shakes his head softly. "Sweetie, I don't think that's such a good idea."

"Please, Daddy," she asks quietly, pleading with him with her eyes.

He studies his daughter carefully and she doesn't look annoyed or mad or spiteful; instead, she simply looks tired. He's concerned about his daughter, but after all that she's been through in the past day and a half, there's no way he can say no to her right now. He reluctantly stands and leans over the bed, placing a kiss to her forehead. "The nurse said she'd be in to check on you again soon. But if you need anything at all, don't hesitate to let someone know. We're all just down the hall."

She smiles for his benefit and nods, exchanging quick 'I love you's' before she finally finds herself alone in the room, free to just think.

Sighing she looks back at the window and wishes she had had her father open it for her before he left so she could see outside. She feels trapped in the hospital room, but at the same time, she's in so much pain that she can barely move, so she supposes she better get used to the feeling.

She can hear a faint beep of a heart monitor and feel a tube giving her oxygen into her nose and an IV in her hand. She's never felt so weak in her life and it scares her to her core. She closes her eyes and remembers being in the alley and being so unshakably sure she was going to die.

She remembers that her last thought had been a memory of Chuck that had happened almost a year ago, and as she lays in the uncomfortable hospital bed, she realizes that that was the last time she was truly happy.

After her and Chuck had come home from visiting her father the year before, she was so scared he'd become bored with her, she'd come up with their stupid game humiliating all those girls. Once the game had ended, he suddenly got so wrapped up in his business that he hardly ever had time for her anymore. Serena was always flitting around between all her drama-filled situations like always, basically leaving her on her own, and NYU was just a horrible abomination that hurt her pride and self-worth more than anything ever had before.

The last year of her life had been depressing at best. She had been reduced to a nothing but a pathetic sidekick, desperately begging the people that were supposed to love her more than anything for even the smallest amount of attention.

That is not who Blair Waldorf is supposed to be.

She yawns and opens her suddenly heavy eyelids to look at the window again.

She knows she is lucky to be alive, and really, she doesn't even understand how she is still here. No matter what though, she is determined not to waste this second chance. She is determined to be happy.

Her eyes quickly fall shut again and she almost instantly drifts off into a heavy slumber.

–––

"I don't believe you. She wants to see me!" Serena bellows, tears in her eyes. She turns and motions to her brother a few feet away. "She would want to see Chuck, too."

Eleanor laughs a little to herself and waves them off. "I assure you, Serena, I am not lying. Blair is smart enough to know what you've caused to happen."

"Eleanor, I didn't do anything. I didn't..." she trails off into a sob and the older woman starts in again.

"You did plenty," she barks at the young blonde. "And as for Charles," she continues, narrowing her eyes, "it should be no surprise that my daughter wants nothing to do with him." Eleanor sighs in annoyance and takes a step closer to Serena, before speaking in a quiet, venomous tone. "Now get control of yourself, Serena, before I have you and your step-brother removed."

Serena's jaw drops and she can only watch through silent sobs as Eleanor walks away. Her shoulders shake and she falls back gracelessly into a chair and buries her face into her hands.

Chuck's jaw tenses as he watches the exchange between the two women before sitting next to his sister in a silent show of support. He knows Serena is upset by her fight with Eleanor, but even more so because she can't see Blair, exactly why he's upset as well.

He sighs and looks across the room to see his best friend walk into the room, a tray of coffees in his hand. "Thanks, man," he says with a nod as he grabs a cup after Nate has already given Blair's mother and both her step dad's a cup as well.

"Here Serena," Nate says softly as he holds out the last cup to her and takes a seat on the other side of her.

She looks up at him with sad eyes and tear stained cheeks and gratefully takes the coffee. "Thanks, Nate," she says softly with a few sniffles. "You didn't have to come here."

"How could I not?" he tells her with a smile, putting a comforting hand on her back. "Did something else happen?"

"Eleanor bitched her out," Chuck provides bluntly, as he distractedly takes out his cell phone and starts tapping out a text to his PI.

"What?"

"She thinks this is all my fault," Serena explains tearfully. "You know that if I had thought anything would ever happen to Blair, I never would have left her at the club. I love Blair; she's my sister. I would never want her to be hurt. I don't know why Eleanor can't understand that."

"She's just upset about what happened to her daughter. She's not thinking clearly," Nate comforts her, rubbing her back. "So you were with Blair before it happened?" Off her nod, he continues, "And then you left her to go home? Was she with whoever did this before you left?"

"Well, no. She was alone."

"Oh," he mutters, his face twisting in confusion, "then why did you leave her?"

"Well, um, I.." she starts, biting her lip hard. "I actually left with.. with someone else."

Nate's hand immediately stops rubbing her back he awkwardly pulls away. "Oh."

Serena's face blushes red and she sighs, looking at the ground. "Yeah."

Chuck rolls his eyes and looks away from the two exes in time to see Blair's father walking into the waiting area.

"Harold, is she up?" Eleanor immediately questions, coming to stand before him.

"Yes, she's awake. She seems to be much more alert."

"Can we see her?" Serena asks desperately, quickly crossing the room with a hesitant Chuck right behind her. At this point, he knows he's not going to be allowed to see Blair, but at least if his sister does, he can find out exactly how Blair looks and is feeling.

"I already explained to you, Serena.."

"I know, but.."

"No one is going to see her," Harold interrupts both women. "Blair asked to have some time to herself, and we're all going to respect that."

"She's alone?" Eleanor repeats, with her nose upturned. "Is that really a good idea?"

"I think she's just a little overwhelmed with all that's happened," he explains, trying to conceal his concern with a small smile. "Eleanor, maybe you and Cyrus should go home and get some rest and something to eat. Serena, you should go get some sleep as well," he suggests to the two women, before turning to the young man before him, acknowledging him for the first time. "Chuck.."

"I'm not leaving," he interrupts, his tone leaving absolutely no room for argument and making it obvious to everyone how much he cares.

Harold studies him for a long moment before nodding in understanding. He pats Chuck on the back as he walks away, and Chuck is optimistic that maybe his relationship with Blair's family isn't lost yet.

"Did you get a hotel room?"

He turns to see Serena pulling at his arm, looking at him hopefully. "No, I came here right from the airport," he explains, before furrowing his eyebrow at her. "Why?"

"I can't stay at Eleanor's anymore; she hates me!"

He sighs and studies his sister for a long moment before coming up with an idea. Pulling out his wallet, he takes out his credit card and holds it out reluctantly towards her. "Just for a hotel," he tells her before finally letting go of it. "Get something with at least two rooms. I have a feeling I'm going to be staying in Paris for awhile."

"Thanks, Chuck," she tells him sincerely before pulling him into a hug. "I know Blair is glad to know you're here, even if she doesn't want to admit it or apparently see either of us."

He smiles sadly for his sister before watching her walk away. His shoulder's slump tiredly and he slowly walks back and falls into a chair next to Nate.

"Just so you know," he explains, giving his best friend's shoulder a supportive squeeze, "I came here for you. Not for Serena."

Smiling wearily to himself, Chuck can't help but feel relieved to have his best friend at his side.

"Are you doing okay?"

Chuck sighs, exhausted, before turning his eyes to his best friend. "No," he answers simply, because he's not okay. He's never been more worried, scared, or angry before in his life, and he knows he won't feel any better until he sees that Blair is really okay for himself.

–––

Stopping in the lobby bathroom, Serena splashes some cool water on her face and tries to salvage and repair the little make-up she has left before she goes out into public. There's bags under her eyes and her lips chapped. She sighs and decides it's hopeless, and probably un-necessary as well. With Blair in the hospital and Nate probably hating her more than ever, her looks are the least of her problems.

Digging into her bag, she pulls on her sunglasses and puts them on. Sighing at her appearance, she rolls her eyes and walks out of the bathroom.

"..she was brought in here early yesterday with a bullet wound."

Serena's brow immediately furrows in confusion as she over hears part of a conversation from a few feet behind her. Turning on her heel, she sees a tall, dark and handsome man leaning against the reception desk in jeans and a dark blue button down.

"What is her name?" she hears the receptionist ask in a thick French accent.

"I don't know her name.. I just…"

"I can't simply give out any information about a patient to anybody, especially if you don't even know their name."

Hesitantly, she takes crosses the few steps between her and the mystery guy and stands behind him, listening curiously.

"Look, I'm not trying to do anything wrong here," the guy explains, clearly a little frustrated. "I found her after she'd been shot and I just want to make sure that she.."

"You're the one who found Blair?" Serena suddenly blurts, causing the boy before her to jump and turn to her in surprise. She blushes and smiles when his brown eyes land on her. "Sorry," she apologizes quickly, "I couldn't help but over hear."

"No, that's fine," he assures her, a serious look on his face. "Her name is.. Blair? Is that what you said?"

She quickly nods, not believing how lucky Blair was to get saved by such a cutie.

"Is she okay?" he asks, sincerely concerned. "I know it's probably weird for some stranger to be asking you this, but I haven't been able to stop thinking about her since the ambulance took her away."

"She's fine. Or at least she will be fine," she answers, relieved. "But she wouldn't have been if it weren't for you, so thank you so much; really."

He shrugs and she swears she can see him blushing. "I'm just glad Blair…?"

"Waldorf," she finds herself finishing for him without a thought.

"I'm just glad Blair Waldorf is going to be okay."

She frowns as he starts to walk away towards the exit and finds herself calling after him. "Hey! What's your name?"

"Ryan," he calls back with a smile before walking out the exit, leaving Serena there, staring after him in curiosity.

–––

"I can't sit here any more."

Looking exhausted and frustrated around the room, where Roman is passed out in a chair, Harold is twiddling his thumbs thoughtfully and Nate can barely keep his eyes open after only being here a few hours, Chuck can't take it anymore.

He elbows his best friend in the side and motions for him to follow as he gets up.

"Where are you two going?" Harold asks, eying them curiously.

"Cafeteria," Chuck answers simply.

He heads over to the elevator within sight of the waiting room with Nate following close behind him. Smiling for Harold's benefit as the doors close, he hits the button for the third floor, the floor below where he's been waiting all night and most of today.

"The cafeteria is on the first floor."

"We're not going to the cafeteria. We're going to see Blair."

"What?" Nate breathes in confusion as the elevator doors open again. He finds himself having to rush to keep up with Chuck as he heads out through a busy hallway. "You do know that Blair doesn't want to see you, right? And that she is on the floor we just left, not down here?"

"First of all, Nathaniel, we're not going to bother Blair. I just need to look and make sure she's okay with my own eyes. She won't even know we're there," he explains cooly as he continues to walk fast, from one end of the building to the other. "Secondly, I have a plan. What do you think I've been thinking about for the last three hours since Serena and Eleanor left?"

Nate smiles to himself and shakes his head. "Okay, well what's the plan?"

"It's simple," he starts as they approach the end of the hallway. "We find another elevator somewhere else in the building," he explains as they happen upon an elevator and he hits the button to have it open up for them immediately, "take it back to Blair's floor, and find our way to her room from the other side of the building so none of her family sees us."

"That's the plan? I could've come up with that."

"It doesn't have to be complex, it just has to work," Chuck explains as they step back out onto the fourth floor. "Now we just have to find her room."

"You don't know the number?"

Chuck shakes his head, before going to peak in through the little window on a random room door. "It's not that one."

"Oh my god, man."

"Are you going to help me? I'm desperate here, Nathaniel," Chuck practically begs before peaking into another room.

Nate studies his best friend and can't help but agree about him being desperate. His tie was long ago taken off, his shirt was unbuttoned at the top and untucked, his suit jacket was gone, and he looked as if he hadn't slept in a a long, long time. "Fine," he mutters, giving in and peaking into a window in search of a girl who was technically both of their ex-girlfriend.

Both of them continue peaking into windows, one after another, quickly making their way through nearly half the hallway, only stopping their search when someone else walks by.

They only have a handful of rooms left when an agonizing, heartbreaking cry suddenly breaks the quiet in peaceful hallway and Chuck immediately feels his blood run cold, because he knows that voice.

"Blair."

* * *

_TBC..._


	4. Chapter 4

_A near death experience can change everything. It can make a person question who they are and what they believe and who they want to be. But no matter what, in the end, they're still the same person. ChuckxBlair. Blair is mugged a few days into her summer break in France._

_Wow, again, thank you so much for the great reviews! I really, really appreciate all the responses to this story. :)_

* * *

_Her mind is hazy as she watches the city pass by in a blur outside the limo's tinted windows. _

_She isn't sure where she's headed and she can't remember being picked up, but she knows she must be going somewhere special. She's dressed to the nines in a flowing black Chanel dress and there's extravagant diamonds adorning her wrist as well as her neck. She fingers the piece against her throat and smiles in recognition; Chuck's necklace._

_There's a glass of champagne in her hand and it bubbles on her tongue like the excitement in her stomach._

_Without warning, the limo comes to a horribly abrupt stop and she finds herself gripping the edge of the seat to keep herself from slipping off. She frowns, spying her champagne spilled across the car floor. _

_Sliding across the seat, she shoves open the door before stepping into the night and out on the curb in a fuss. She quickly stomps her way to front of the limo, ready to give Chuck's driver a piece of her mind, but she instead finds the seats to be empty. Her brow furrows in confusion and she looks around her for the man, but instead finds herself completely and utterly alone. Not one other car or person is anywhere in sight, something that is simply not possible in New York. Her hearts starts to beat a little faster in fear and a chill runs down her back as she turns to see where the limo had stopped. _

_She finds herself staring up in complete confusion at a church and she starts towards it quickly. As she makes her way up the stairs towards the doorway, her palms start to sweat with nervousness, but she's always been good at pretending to be courageous, so she doesn't hesitate to push open the heavy oak doors and let herself inside._

_Warm light covers her and draws her into the church where hundreds of candles sparkle and burn around the room and modest bouquets of peonies line the empty pews. _

_She gazes lovingly around and there's butterflies in her stomach, fluttering out of control in pure joy as she comes to the conclusion that Chuck must have set this up for her. Her eyes travel to the altar where she just knows her beloved is waiting for her._

_Her breath stops. _

_At the end of the aisle before her, sits an open, white coffin surrounded by a sea of peonies. She's instinctively drawn to it and her feet start moving of their own accord towards the ornate box with silver details, even as her heart races out of control in her chest. The closer and closer she gets to the front of the church, the slower her steps get, because she knows who's in that casket, and before she can even begin to process it, she's staring down at her own pale, lifeless face._

_"Blair was my best friend.."_

_She jumps at the sudden voice echoing through the church and turns to see Serena has appeared a few feet away at the podium._

_"..We didn't always get along, but I always knew I could count on her to be there when it mattered most. She was the most loyal person I know, and if you were lucky enough to love her and be loved by her, she was going to make sure she did everything in her power to make sure you were always okay. I don't know where I'd be without her and I don't know how I'll be able to go on, but I'll always remember her and I'll always love her."_

_There's a empty, nauseous feeling in her stomach as she watches her best friend talk so passionately through her tears. This can't be happening. She can't be.. dead? She watches Serena walk back to her seat and is taken back when she sees that the pews have suddenly filled with all of her friends and family, but she's even more at a loss at who she sees standing to take the podium next._

_He walks evenly and his eyes look vacant and emotionless, but she can tell he's not drunk and he's not high. His suit is perfectly pressed and his hair is combed and she wonders if he's hurt at all by her supposed death. He takes a deep breath at the podium and looks out at the crowd before calmly starting._

_"Blair Waldorf is.."_

_He abruptly stops and she can see his jaw tighten as he drops his head to look at the ground. There's a long moment of silence that leaves her stomach twisting, before he takes a strangled breath and looks towards her and the coffin. Their eyes meet, and she knows he doesn't really see her, but she can clearly see every once of his pain shining in his suddenly watery brown eyes and it overwhelms her. She can see him trembling as he looks out at the crowd again._

_"Blair Waldorf _was_.."_

_He trails off again as tears start to slip down his cheeks and he doesn't bother to wipe them away as her own tears start to fall at the sight of him. He looks down at the floor again in absolute despair before mumbling some sort of apology and rushing off the altar and down the aisle. _

_Her heart absolutely shatters and she follows him towards the exit as quickly as she can, calling out his name, but he doesn't hear her. She follows him out of the church and into the darkened, empty streets but she doesn't see which way he goes and she doesn't stop running to find him until after she's gotten so far from the church and the limo she doesn't know how to get back. Her mind is frantic; she has to find him, she has to find him before he does something stupid._

_A sudden bump against her shoulder jars her from her thoughts and makes her gasp._

_"Keep your mouth shut or I'll shoot."_

_She feels the sharp, metallic jab into her side and the sweaty hand pulling her into an alley and suddenly she remembers how she must've died. She remembers being shot because she fought back, and she's not sure how she could have been so dumb as to fight someone with a gun. So she doesn't fight back, she lets him take her diamond bracelet, her heart ring from her father, and even the necklace Chuck had given her. She's already imagining calling him to say she's alive and needs a replacement when the man steps back and studies her._

_"Take off your dress."_

_She stands frozen in fear, her stomach dropping. She doesn't know what to do; she doesn't want to die, but she doesn't want to give in to this either._

_"I said take off your dress," he repeats slowly, his brow turned in rage as he pulls out his gun and points it at her._

_She shakes her head no just the slightest and suddenly he's on her, pushing and pulling on her gown while keeping the gun dug into her side. For a moment she lets him, until her lingerie is exposed and there's fresh tears on her cheeks as she chokes back sobs, but then she snaps. She fights back with all her might, kicking and scratching, and waits for the gunshot, almost longs for it, but it never comes. Instead, her attacker pulls back and slams the pistol into the side of her head. _

_He lets her fall to the ground, and as she blinks through the blackness overtaking, she can feel him on her once again._

_She tries to fight again, but her limbs are like jelly and her mind is too tired. All she can do is sob as he hikes up her dress and his disgusting fingers pull at her panties. Her whole body goes into overdrive in fear, her heart pounds, her stomach turns, her throat tightens, and her fingers shake as she waits for what she knows comes next._

Blair's eyes flash open, looking wildly around her as she comes out of her dream in panic.

Before she has a chance to think better of it, she frantically pushes herself up to sit and look around the room. Instantly her body protests the movement and she cries out in sheer agony at the pain that starts in her side and runs deep through what feels like every nerve in her body. She crumples in on herself, her breath coming out in choked gasps as she leans forward and grabs desperately at her wound.

There's tears falling on her pale cheeks as she hears the door open, but she's wincing so hard in pain that she can't bear to look up and see who it is.

"Go get a doctor!"

She hears someone yell and she knows the voice instantly, and it's only further confirmed when one of his warm hands lands on her back.

"Chuck," she sobs, and in this moment where she is completely overwhelmed by absolute terror and agony, she can admit to herself that she couldn't be more relieved that he was the one to walk in.

"I'm here," he assures her strongly as his stomach drops in worry while his mind focuses on making sure she's okay.

He presses a kiss to her hair, which seems to be damp from sweat and makes him even more concerned. He smoothes his palm against her warm forehead for a moment, concluding that she probably has a fever, before pulling one of her trembling hands into his.

He whispers word of reassurance to her as she grips back his hand tight, making his heart ache for her. Her heart monitor is beeping what seems to him to be way too fast and her breathing is ragged and quick and he wishes he could take away all the pain that's making her suffer. "Shh, Blair, you're okay. You're going to be okay," he murmurs gently against her ear. "You have to calm down though."

She tries to listen to him and take a deep breath but she can't seem to do anything but continue to cry.

It kills him to not be able to help her and he can't stand to listen to her sobbing anymore and is caught between sighing in relief and screaming at the doctor when he appears.

"How long has she been like this?"

"I don't know, a few minutes," he answers quickly. "I think she has a fever and she's in a lot of pain."

He watches as the doctor mumbles some orders in French to a nurse before she runs out of the room in search of something. "She might have an infection, but first of all, she definitely shouldn't be sitting up like this. Her wound is too fragile still." He puts a hand on Blair's arm, trying to get her attention. "Ms. Waldorf? I'm going to need you to lie back down, okay?"

She nods a little through her tears and Chuck helps her back down on the bed slowly and she whimpers as he moves her.

"Can I have you step outside for a few minutes, sir?" the doctor orders more than asks as the nurse reappears and starts futzing with Blair's IV.

He hesitates and meets Blair's gaze. Her red-rimmed, brown eyes are wide and fearful as she looks up at him, and he swears he can feel her hand tighten around his. He can't leave her alone like this.

"Come on, man," Nate suddenly calls, pulling on his arm, and Chuck had honestly forgotten he was even there. Easily, he shakes him off and turns back to Blair.

He watches as the doctor moves the blanket on the bed down to her hips to protect her modesty, before lifting her hospital gown. He swallows as he sees the flat expanse of her stomach that he knows so well with a large, gauze bandage on one side, the few patches of bright red on it scaring him to his core.

"What happened? Why is she still bleeding?" he demands.

The doctor eyes him in frustration. "Young man, you need to wait outside," he tells him again as he carefully peels back the edge of her bandage.

"Just tell me what's going on," he barks in demand, causing the room to stop in tense silence at his outburst. He takes a deep breath to calm himself, meeting the doctor's gaze before softening and almost begging, "Please."

The doctor sighs, looking between the two teenagers, and reluctantly gives in. "It looks like a few of her stitches are torn," he explains rapidly. "I need to go prepare to restitch this and by the time get I back, she should be asleep and you need to be gone, okay?"

He nods in agreement, only because he doesn't have a choice.

She sees people leaving and tenses, pulling on his hand to keep him there. "Chuck," Blair mutters again, her eyes starting to droop from whatever the nurse gave her.

He kisses her hand and brushes his fingers against her forehead and into her auburn locks. "I'm still here, Waldorf," he tells her softly. "I'm not going anywhere."

Moving up the bed, he sits on the side and pulls her hand into his lap and holding it firmly. Gently, he grazes his fingers across her cheeks, wiping away the remnants of her tears. He studies her beautiful face and he is taken back by how pale and utterly weak she looks. For the first time he truly understands how close he was to really losing her.

Her body feels heavy, her head feels thick, and she knows she's going to be out within seconds. She opens her tired eyes to see him looking down at her with love and concern and she can't help but be comforted by his mere presence.

She lets her lids fall closed again and she feels his warm lips brush against her cheek. As she drifts off she swears, she swears she hears him tell her those three words, eight letters she hasn't heard in what feels like so long.

–––

If Chuck thought he had felt unwelcome before, he doesn't know how to explain what it feels like to be in the waiting room now.

After Eleanor had frantically returned to the hospital, she had to be physically restrained by both Cyrus and Harold from getting security to throw him out. Of course she thought this was all his fault and seemed ready to tear his eyes out when she heard he had snuck back to visit her daughter.

He gives up on his restless pacing and drops into a chair next to Serena, avoiding Eleanor's gaze as she glares him down from across the room. He has to admit he's surprised she hasn't attacked him yet, because ever since Harold went back to sit with Blair, he's been waiting for it. But she can do whatever she wants to him, because there's no way he's leaving.

He sighs to himself as he thinks about how frail and panicked Blair was. He doesn't think he'll ever be able to forget how she looked in that hospital bed and how scared he was when he heard her crying. There's a hollow feeling in his gut that hasn't gone away since he saw her frightened eyes looking up at him. It's been hours upon hours since he was kicked out of her room and he needs to see her again, but he can't help but wonder if she'll want to see him.

"Chuck," Serena interrupts his thoughts, elbowing him. "Maybe it's time you go to the hotel and get some sleep. Take a break from all this."

He lets out a heavy breath, not even bothering to answer her.

"Or at least to take a shower," she continues, teasing him and trying to lighten the mood. "You look like crap."

"Impossible, sis," he drawls tiredly, sinking back into his seat.

She laughs wryly at him before growing serious as she studies him. "Why'd you sleep with Jenny?" she asks curiously out of the blue.

His eyes instantly widen at her. "Serena," he growls lowly.

"What? It's a legitimate question," she defends. "It's obvious you still love B, and we've been sitting here forever and I'm bored. So just open up to your dear sister and tell me why you did it."

He sighs and shakes his head, giving in. "It was a mistake," he explains quickly. "Blair didn't show up and I thought that meant she didn't love me anymore."

"But she was just running late. Maybe if you waited more than a half an hour before jumping into bed with.."

"I didn't know she was running late," he interrupts quickly. "Of course, if I had thought she was ever going to show, I would have waited forever for her. She should have called me or text me and told me she was on her way and I would have stayed."

"She would have never done that," Serena quickly points out. "It would have ruined the perfect Hollywood ending we both know she had built up in her head. You're distraught and lost thinking she's never going to show, and then she bursts in and you suddenly know she loves you too and you both live happily ever after."

A small, melancholy smile forms on his lips at the thought of Blair and her endearing but sometimes unrealistic dreaming. "You're probably right," he concedes And if she had been on time, that would have been exactly what happened; happily ever after. He even had the ring to ensure it and it hasn't left his suit pocket since.

"From now on though, maybe it'd be wise to only replicate romantic gestures that actually worked from movies. I mean, Deborah Kerr got hit by a car on the way to the Empire State Building," Serena tells him teasingly but slightly horrified at the same time. "And just so you know, Cary Grant waited until midnight before he gave up. I still think you should have.."

"I know, Serena, I should have waited longer," he agrees again tiredly. "At the time, though, I was too.." _heartbroken_, he finishes in his head, but doesn't say. "I thought I had finally messed up so badly that she was through with me for good. So when seven o'clock passed, I just assumed it was over forever and I couldn't handle it," he tells her sadly. "But somehow, I actually managed to mess it up more and truly ruin it forever."

"I don't think you can ever really ruin it forever, Chuck," she assures her brother softly. "Blair loves you. You just need to regain her trust and make sure she feels safe with you again. It might take awhile, but she'll let you back in at some point. You guys love each other too much for her not to."

He fiddles with his fingers and looks down at the floor. "I can't stop thinking… What if this was it? What if she hadn't made it?" he quietly admits, his voice nothing more than a hoarse whisper. "What if she had died and the last time I talked to her it was a fight? What if she died not knowing how much I love her?" He pauses, shaking his head to himself. "She was in so much pain and so weak when I saw her. I didn't realize how close she was to.."

"But she didn't," Serena interrupts, gently placing a hand on his shoulder. "She's still here. You have a second chance to change all that."

He closes his eyes in thought, wringing his hands. Serena is right; he does have a second chance. He needs to stop focusing on what could have happened and start thinking about what had. Blair is still here and he is going to do everything he can to prove he is worthy of her once again.

"Chuck?"

He looks up to see Harold standing in the archway, looking at him hesitantly, a fuming Eleanor at his side.

"Blair's asking for you to come see her."

Chuck immediately stands and takes a deep breath to steady himself. It is time to start the second chance he's been given to win Blair Waldorf all over again.

* * *

_TBC..._


End file.
